22 Comments
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Tanya Jones's avatar

I was engaged from the start to the end. You’re quite good at this writing stuff, Jesse!

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Justin Kalef's avatar

What a wild and brilliant foray into strange fiction! Bravo.

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Mo Diddly's avatar

I certainly hope it was fiction

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Dan B's avatar

I have nothing to say except I curse you for putting the Water Country theme song back into my consciousness.

More seriously, as someone who also grew up more secular than Jewish but who currently attends plenty of religious events hosted by Chabad, this was a really interesting exploration of many of the feelings and themes that swim around in my head often!

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Brad's avatar

Will God punish me for posting the Water Country theme song?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9LOWoD21Z-M

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Unset's avatar

Generally I think it is best to be clear from the start if it is a short true story or a short work of fiction. Nothing personal, I'm just not interested in reading short fiction on Substack.

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thisiskdo's avatar

This went from ‘oh that’s why there were friendly Orthodox Jews asking me if I was Jewish during my time on Saint Marks Pl’ … to holy fuck they know all about Jesse … to oh this is pure fiction

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thisiskdo's avatar

It’s also not very good or interesting - wouldn’t quit the day job Jesse.

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Sarah's avatar

I enjoyed this immensely. I’m glad you shared it!

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Brad's avatar

If Ebenezer Scrooge had been Jewish, he would have said "Bah! Mitzvah!"

Or maybe "Mitzvah? Bah!"

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Patrick Dalton-Holmes's avatar

Awesome.

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Martha's avatar

This feels like a dream sequence. Some days I wake up exhausted from all my crazy dreams. I tell God that I don't need to be entertained while I am sleeping

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Douglas Eckberg's avatar

Um, yeah. Maybe you have to be Jewish. Or a New Yorker. Or both. Just saying.

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Dylan's avatar

I'm a Jewish New Yorker

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Brendan Keen's avatar

I snorted into my coffee (in public no less) at the communion wafer-Jameson line.

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Bram E. Gieben's avatar

Really enjoyed how this suddenly sweved into surreal, vaguely homoerotic dreamlike territory. Not what I was expecting, really enjoyed it!

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Sarah Smythe's avatar

I loved this.

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Dylan's avatar

The thing with fiction like this is that if you bend the suspension of disbelief too much then after a point it's no longer enjoyable. You either gotta lean into it from the start with a fictional world (e.g., Westeros) or make it seem like this could realistically happen in our world. This story unfortunately does neither. But I read it through to the end anyway because I support Jesse and hoped there was a moral to the ending.

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Bram E. Gieben's avatar

Philip K Dick, Franz Kafka and Jorge Luis Borges would like a quick word with Dylan

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Red Ambition's avatar

How much of this is based in reality? Did you in fact encounter a Dovi while jogging? Just curious as to the genesis of this idea. Good writing by the way.

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JohnFromNewHampshire's avatar

I grew up in Portsmouth NH on the same road as Water Country just a half mile down or so. My mom owned a small business in town so she was on the Chamber of Commerce. Water Country opened for families of the CoC the day before they opened for the public and it was fun to have free reign of the park with only a dozen or so other kids. But this was May in New Hampshire and it was COLD and I have vivid memories of shivering running from slide to slide.

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Filk's avatar
Dec 12Edited

I was a Water Wizz (terrible name) and Surf Coaster U.S.A. (R.I.P) at Weirs Beach kid.

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