Back in 1989 I had the chance to visit Lenningrad before the wall came down. Even though the city was falling apart and crumbling, I would have never guessed what would happen just a few months later in the East block. Anyways, a large group of tourists got on a city bus and one asked the driver which buses to take to get to a restaurant across town. The bus driver said, no problem, for some amount of $USD he would take them there. So, the driver got up, announced the bus was out of service and kicked everyone off and took the group to their destination. Everything was for sale. Everything was possible with the right amount of money. I am so thankful not to live in such a place...
I believe the joke is that a East German man who had gotten permission go visit the west came home and was swarmed by relatives asking how the Capitalist hell was.
“Same as here--everything can be bought with enough Deutschmarks.”
“We’re on the terrace of the Café Tingis in the Petit Socco, a square once renowned for all sorts of naughtiness. Jonathan, with his piercing blue eyes, swept-back silvery hair and air of languid amusement, seems to thrive on Tangier. He came here in 1992 to do a piece for the Evening Standard and stayed. He sighs a little regretfully as his café au lait arrives. ‘They used to sell booze, all these caffs.’ In 1956, after Morocco won independence, liquor was banned from the medina and the party, if not over, at least went underground. ‘So Tangier is a shadow of its former racy self?’ Jonathan rakes the square with a half-smile. ‘Everything is here if you want it. You can have boys, girls, cockerels or anything you want . . .’ ‘Drugs?’ ‘It’s not, er . . . legal, but it’s sort of slightly not illegal. I don’t encourage it,’ he says, before adding cheerfully, ‘I’ve got a great friend coming to stay. She’s a dope-smoking grandmother. You should be interviewing her.’ For Jonathan, Tangier remains a tolerant place, where you can be what you want to be. He likes the sea and the beaches and the freshness of the food, the fact that it can get cold enough for open fires and, of course, the prices. ‘You can buy a villa”
I LOVE this piece of writing. At last, I learned interesting new things! Wouldn’t it be great to have a substack, or podcast about different cultures and norms worldwide? (maybe there is one?)
Thank you so much: more, more more! And … can we get you started on the pig hat-trick thing? Very curious.
One of my favorite series ever was one about how to do business in different cities all over the world. How on time are people, what to do if you get into legal trouble, who pays for food/drinks, are you expected to party, etc.
"Alcohol is haram. Pork is haram. Premarital sex is hella haram. . ."
I'd like to see an analysis of what is hella haram by region and demographics. As far as I can tell, pork* being haram is the most important rule to a lot of young, Middle Eastern men, who want to drink and get laid, but who think pigs are gross. And I've never had more vodka than in post-Soviet, Muslim-majority countries.
*wild boar doesn't seem to count at least in parts of rural Turkey. Don't know how common that is or if it's just a case of one dude who decided for the group that it didn't count.
Yes! The relative elasticity of sin is quite an interesting question. I was being a bit stylistically glib in my description above, because in my experience the most severe taboo for even mildly-practicing Muslims is really just eating pork. Maybe the next step up is having gay sex as the bottom. Those two things are probably the only serious bright lines never meant to be crossed.
Beyond that, severity declines significantly. People might drink a little alcohol or fornicate a bit so long as they are not too ostentatious about it.
I assumed you were being stylistically glib and it's a good line. But I'm fascinated by this in general. As a good Catholic girl in the US, I have a decent number of female Muslim friends (it's A Thing, or I'm convinced it would be if we had a larger Muslim population). They'd never dream of drinking or fornicating. Or, once they did one of those things, they generally decided they were not religious, a classic amongst formerly-prudish religious girls. It was amazing when I went to the middle of nowhere Turkey and all the good Muslim boys would try to get in my pants over a beer. Though, the girls there didn't seem to drink, so maybe it's gender-based more than location-based.
Yes, I should have delineated the double standards. Fornication is much more severely policed and condemned for women. It's still not allowed for men but seen more of an annoyance, especially if the men are mitigating the damage by fucking women who are already condemned as irredeemable (namely sluts and non-muslims). Taking away their chastity or getting them pregnant can be dismissed as someone else's problem. Drinking is seen as a gateway to philandering, so it'll get policed along a similar axis.
Love your writing, Yassine! It’s always informative and expands my horizons to include things I never would have thought of. Would love to see more of it.
This reminds me of the way a friend of mine talks about India. That idea that traffic crimes don't really exist because you only get a ticket if you are too timid to pay the officer. A good reminder that what countries present to tourists and the reality of those countries often differ wildly. Americans may as well be visiting a different Morocco because no matter what they do the realities of the country will never be revealed to them.
When I read "don’t get me started on the premarital sex with a drunken pig hat trick" at first I thought you meant some kind of trick to avoid getting in trouble for premarital sex if you wore a "drunken pig hat".
What do we know about police corruption in the US compared to other countries? What about a State by State breakdown?
Looking back on the few times I've had reason to interact with officers, the idea both of offering a bribe to and the officer accepting one seem ludicrous. (I live in MN.)
How would you try to measure corruption in the US? The examples I know of for cops usually involve them using their position to coerce sex from people, not bribes. If a cop is after money, there are plenty of alternate legal avenues to rake in the cash (e.g. overtime). The corruption scandals that do get uncovered tend to be off-the-scale huge, like the Baltimore Gun Trace Task Force.
That is the huge thing about living in the states when I talk to foreigners. It is just so amazing to never feel like you need to bribe anyone.
Though obviously up at the national politics it is all about "campaign donations" and "lobbying". but that is also true other places, there are just ALSO bribes.
Unlike Egypt, Morocco doesn't have any Pyramids. However, unlike Egypt it does have mountains. Big ones. Folks, I know have gone to Morocco for conferences. The reports coming back were favorable.
"If you don’t happen to have the money on hand, not a problem — they’ll just confiscate your actual driver license and hold it at the local Sûreté Nationale bureau until you can come back with the funds."
This recently happened to someone I know on vacation in the Yucatan.
I can't provide any useful insights about Morocco. However, for many years I was obsessed with the book (it's not really a book) '1001 Arabian Nights'. Of course, the original 'book' (really a collection of stories) was not written in English. However, many translations to English exist.
Essentially all of the characters are Muslim. Indeed, Islam is taken for granted in these stories. What I found interesting was the absence of extremism (of any kind) and the pervasiveness of alcohol. Indeed, only one character (in these stories) refuses to drink alcohol. He makes up fake excuses for his abstinence.
Officially, alcohol may be forbidden to Muslims. However, it was quite common and accepted in the stories I read.
The driver's license story made me laugh out loud--and I have COVID right now, so it's no mean feat.
More like this, please.
Back in 1989 I had the chance to visit Lenningrad before the wall came down. Even though the city was falling apart and crumbling, I would have never guessed what would happen just a few months later in the East block. Anyways, a large group of tourists got on a city bus and one asked the driver which buses to take to get to a restaurant across town. The bus driver said, no problem, for some amount of $USD he would take them there. So, the driver got up, announced the bus was out of service and kicked everyone off and took the group to their destination. Everything was for sale. Everything was possible with the right amount of money. I am so thankful not to live in such a place...
I believe the joke is that a East German man who had gotten permission go visit the west came home and was swarmed by relatives asking how the Capitalist hell was.
“Same as here--everything can be bought with enough Deutschmarks.”
So strange to think of Deutschmarks and Oster marks again :) There were some great jokes back then. The one making the rounds with my relatives was
Census Taker: Where were you born old man ?
Old Man: I was born in St. Petersburg
CT: Where did you go to school ?
OM: Petrograd
CT: Where did you get married ?
OM: Lenningrad
CT: Where do you think you will be buried ?
OM: St. Petersburg
I'm two years late, but can you explain the joke?
Reminds me of this quote about Morocco.
“We’re on the terrace of the Café Tingis in the Petit Socco, a square once renowned for all sorts of naughtiness. Jonathan, with his piercing blue eyes, swept-back silvery hair and air of languid amusement, seems to thrive on Tangier. He came here in 1992 to do a piece for the Evening Standard and stayed. He sighs a little regretfully as his café au lait arrives. ‘They used to sell booze, all these caffs.’ In 1956, after Morocco won independence, liquor was banned from the medina and the party, if not over, at least went underground. ‘So Tangier is a shadow of its former racy self?’ Jonathan rakes the square with a half-smile. ‘Everything is here if you want it. You can have boys, girls, cockerels or anything you want . . .’ ‘Drugs?’ ‘It’s not, er . . . legal, but it’s sort of slightly not illegal. I don’t encourage it,’ he says, before adding cheerfully, ‘I’ve got a great friend coming to stay. She’s a dope-smoking grandmother. You should be interviewing her.’ For Jonathan, Tangier remains a tolerant place, where you can be what you want to be. He likes the sea and the beaches and the freshness of the food, the fact that it can get cold enough for open fires and, of course, the prices. ‘You can buy a villa”
— Sahara by Michael Palin
https://a.co/3RNVyNo
I LOVE this piece of writing. At last, I learned interesting new things! Wouldn’t it be great to have a substack, or podcast about different cultures and norms worldwide? (maybe there is one?)
Thank you so much: more, more more! And … can we get you started on the pig hat-trick thing? Very curious.
One of my favorite series ever was one about how to do business in different cities all over the world. How on time are people, what to do if you get into legal trouble, who pays for food/drinks, are you expected to party, etc.
Just super interesting.
What was it called?
"Alcohol is haram. Pork is haram. Premarital sex is hella haram. . ."
I'd like to see an analysis of what is hella haram by region and demographics. As far as I can tell, pork* being haram is the most important rule to a lot of young, Middle Eastern men, who want to drink and get laid, but who think pigs are gross. And I've never had more vodka than in post-Soviet, Muslim-majority countries.
*wild boar doesn't seem to count at least in parts of rural Turkey. Don't know how common that is or if it's just a case of one dude who decided for the group that it didn't count.
Yes! The relative elasticity of sin is quite an interesting question. I was being a bit stylistically glib in my description above, because in my experience the most severe taboo for even mildly-practicing Muslims is really just eating pork. Maybe the next step up is having gay sex as the bottom. Those two things are probably the only serious bright lines never meant to be crossed.
Beyond that, severity declines significantly. People might drink a little alcohol or fornicate a bit so long as they are not too ostentatious about it.
I assumed you were being stylistically glib and it's a good line. But I'm fascinated by this in general. As a good Catholic girl in the US, I have a decent number of female Muslim friends (it's A Thing, or I'm convinced it would be if we had a larger Muslim population). They'd never dream of drinking or fornicating. Or, once they did one of those things, they generally decided they were not religious, a classic amongst formerly-prudish religious girls. It was amazing when I went to the middle of nowhere Turkey and all the good Muslim boys would try to get in my pants over a beer. Though, the girls there didn't seem to drink, so maybe it's gender-based more than location-based.
Yes, I should have delineated the double standards. Fornication is much more severely policed and condemned for women. It's still not allowed for men but seen more of an annoyance, especially if the men are mitigating the damage by fucking women who are already condemned as irredeemable (namely sluts and non-muslims). Taking away their chastity or getting them pregnant can be dismissed as someone else's problem. Drinking is seen as a gateway to philandering, so it'll get policed along a similar axis.
My wife and I generally don't wear wedding rings. And we're off to Morocco in February. So thanks for the heads-up!
Super interesting. I Really enjoy Yassine's writing and am always happy when a new post shows up. Thanks!
Great read as always.
Love your writing, Yassine! It’s always informative and expands my horizons to include things I never would have thought of. Would love to see more of it.
… aaaand then I binge-watched the entire first season of Ramy. Thx for that, too.
GOOD
This reminds me of the way a friend of mine talks about India. That idea that traffic crimes don't really exist because you only get a ticket if you are too timid to pay the officer. A good reminder that what countries present to tourists and the reality of those countries often differ wildly. Americans may as well be visiting a different Morocco because no matter what they do the realities of the country will never be revealed to them.
When I read "don’t get me started on the premarital sex with a drunken pig hat trick" at first I thought you meant some kind of trick to avoid getting in trouble for premarital sex if you wore a "drunken pig hat".
blame our copy editor for getting rid of the hyphen in hat-trick
What do we know about police corruption in the US compared to other countries? What about a State by State breakdown?
Looking back on the few times I've had reason to interact with officers, the idea both of offering a bribe to and the officer accepting one seem ludicrous. (I live in MN.)
How would you try to measure corruption in the US? The examples I know of for cops usually involve them using their position to coerce sex from people, not bribes. If a cop is after money, there are plenty of alternate legal avenues to rake in the cash (e.g. overtime). The corruption scandals that do get uncovered tend to be off-the-scale huge, like the Baltimore Gun Trace Task Force.
That is the huge thing about living in the states when I talk to foreigners. It is just so amazing to never feel like you need to bribe anyone.
Though obviously up at the national politics it is all about "campaign donations" and "lobbying". but that is also true other places, there are just ALSO bribes.
You've just got to be smooth. Bribing a Minnesota State Trooper worked out great in "Fargo"...
Unlike Egypt, Morocco doesn't have any Pyramids. However, unlike Egypt it does have mountains. Big ones. Folks, I know have gone to Morocco for conferences. The reports coming back were favorable.
"If you don’t happen to have the money on hand, not a problem — they’ll just confiscate your actual driver license and hold it at the local Sûreté Nationale bureau until you can come back with the funds."
This recently happened to someone I know on vacation in the Yucatan.
I can't provide any useful insights about Morocco. However, for many years I was obsessed with the book (it's not really a book) '1001 Arabian Nights'. Of course, the original 'book' (really a collection of stories) was not written in English. However, many translations to English exist.
Essentially all of the characters are Muslim. Indeed, Islam is taken for granted in these stories. What I found interesting was the absence of extremism (of any kind) and the pervasiveness of alcohol. Indeed, only one character (in these stories) refuses to drink alcohol. He makes up fake excuses for his abstinence.
Officially, alcohol may be forbidden to Muslims. However, it was quite common and accepted in the stories I read.